The Gemara in Brachot (33b) says that one should thank Hashem for the bad that happens in his life the same way that he thanks Him for the good. What exactly did Chazal have in mind here? How can one possibly be thankful for the bad that happens to him? How can a poor person, who has nothing to eat, be as thankful as the wealthy man who affords the world’s finest delicacies? How can one who cannot afford to buy clothing for his children be as thankful as the man who affords closets full of clothing per child?
The Chofetz Chaim explains this with the following parable. A man once presented this question to a Rabbi and was told, “I also do not fully understand our Sages’ words, but we have a real tsaddik in our city who can certainly help you. He suffers a great deal, has barely anything to eat, sleeps on a hard bench and walks around barefoot. This man and his wife receive weekly charity to put the basic necessities on the table, and yet they live a happy life, serving Hashem with happiness, thanking Hashem for all that he has. This person will surely be able to help you understand the words of our sages. The man traveled to the home of this poor man and asked him how he understands the words of our Sages? How do you thank Hashem for all of the bad? To his surprise, the man responded, “You know, I also do not fully understand our Sages’ words. I am not the one who can help you since it seems to me that I never have had a bad day in my life; I lack nothing and Hashem has always been good to me.”
In reality, the tsaddik did not have a wonderful or easy life. But he was thankful for everything he had, and carried himself with a positive attitude which made his life a happy one. From where did he get this attitude? From which of our Avot or Imahot did he see this strength?
In parshat Vayeitzei, the Torah records the birth of Leah’s first four children: Reuven, Shimon, Levi and Yehudah, but the way the Torah characterizes the birth of the fourth son, Yehudah, is a bit odd. The Torah states:
ותהר עוד ותלד בן ותאמר הפעם אודה את ה׳, על כן קראה שמו יהודה, ותעמד מלדת. (כט:לה)
"And she became pregnant again and had a son; and she said: This time I will praise Hashem.” Therefore she called his name Yehudah.”
What does it mean that “this time” she thanked Hashem? Did she not thank Hashem upon the birth of her first three sons?
To make things even more confusing, Rashi on this pasuk quotes the Medrash that says, “From the day that Hashem created the world, no person came to thank Hashem until Leah came and thanked Him here in our parsha with הפעם אודה את ה׳. Why was she so thankful upon the birth of her fourth son? Rashi explains that Leah had a prophesy that through Yaakov there would be twelve tribes from his four wives. With the birth of her fourth son, she gave thanks for having a bigger portion than the other wives. (In actuality she would eventually have six sons).
As if our first question in understanding Chazal was not enough, how are we to possibly understand this Medrash? Leah was the first person to thank Hashem? Was Adam not thankful for being the first man to be created? Was Noach not thankful for being saved from the flood? Was Avraham not thankful for his wife and children? Not Yitzchak either? What does this mean? What is the message for us?
For those of us who are fortunate to have healthy children, we run the risk of taking them for granted. Not just their existence, but the added value that they each bring to the world. Leah understood that having another son meant having another entire tribe that would descend from her. With that came another tribe of people who would serve Hashem and do mitzvot. The domino effect would lead to millions of more mitzvot that would be attributed to Leah. Once Leah realized this, she was astonished and full of thanks.
This could also help us understand why she had more to thank than the Avot and Imahot before her. Until her time, no one had had so many sons to continue their legacy of service of Hashem. Adam only had Kain, Hevel and Sheit, Noach only had Shem, Avraham only had Yitzchak, and Yitzchak only had Yaakov. Leah had the zechut to raise four G-d fearing sons. She felt that having so much more than those before her, obligated her to be that much more thankful.
As Jews, we are called Yehudim, after this name of Yehudah. This name carries a responsibility of not just being thankful for everything we have, but to search for all of the things in our lives that we have to be thankful for. Like the Rabbi in the parable above, we have to see our very existence as a blessing. We have to see our family, our jobs, our community, even the petty things that we tend to focus on as blessings.
How can we teach ourselves to appreciate this reality?
I would argue that the place to start is to take our brachot more seriously. Chazal tell us that we should aim to recite one hundred brachot every day. It is for this reason -- if we are constantly thanking Hashem for what we have and focus on the words, we will come to recognize all of our blessings. Let us all focus on the brachot we recite when waking up in the morning, before we do mitzvot, when we daven, before and after we eat food. There is so much to be thankful for; we just have to open our eyes and see it.
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