Parshat Vayeira - The Root of Morality

For the second time in as many parshiyot, Sarah is thrown into a situation where she is told to act as if  she is the brother of Avraham. On a simple level, we understand Avraham’s intentions were to save himself, for if she were to say she was his wife, they would kill him to take her.  But upon closer look, the text of these two incidents are not the same. When going down to Egypt and Pharaoh in Parshat Lach Lecha, Avraham actually says,

ויהי כאשר הקריב לבוא מצרימה ויאמר אל שרי אשתו, הנה נה ידעתי כי אשה יפת מראה את.

והיה כי יראו אתך המצרים ואמרו אשתו זאת והרגו אתי ואתך יחיו.

אמרי נא אחתי את, למען ייטב לי בעבורך וחיתה נפשי בגללך (יב:יא-יג)

Avraham warns Sarah that the Egyptians might see her beauty and upon hearing he is her husband, they might kill him. Therefore, she should say she is his sister.

However, when looking at the pesukim in this week’s parsha as Avraham and Sarah go south to Grar, all the Torah says is,

ויאמר אברהם אל שרה אשתו אחתי היא, וישלח אבימלך מלך גרר ויקח את שרה (כ:ב).

The text simply says that Avraham told Avimelech that Sarah was his sister.  The text makes no mention of Avraham warning Sarah about this or what his reasons were. Rashi suggests that after being taken by Pharaoh in last week’s parsha, Avraham feared that Sarah might not consent to this ploy for a second time. Here I offer another possibility, but it requires looking at a few more pesukim.

As the story with Avimelech continues, he takes Sarah, but before anything can happen, Hashem appears to him in a dream and says not to touch her for she is a married woman. Avimelech not only listens to Hashem, but claims his innocence for not knowing she was married; Hashem concedes Avimelech’s character would not have done anything with Sarah had he known she was married. Moreover, Avimelech wakes up in a panic, calls in his cabinet and tells them what happened and וייראו האנשים מאד, they were all frightened. It is clear that everyone is upset and scared. But why? The story continues as Avimelech goes to Avraham; This is where the message of the entire episode is found. Avimelech says, what did you do to me? By saying she was your sister you almost caused me to sin with a married woman. We do not do things like that in this place! Then comes the big question from Avimelech:

? What did you see here that caused you to do this- מה ראית כי עשית את הדבר הזה?

At this point, I feel sorry for Avimelech; he is upset about almost committing a huge sin, is seemingly not only sincere, but  seems right in his accusation against Avraham. What do you expect Avraham to answer? This is what Avraham replies,

ויאמר אברהם כי אמרתי רק אין יראת אלקים במקום הזה, והרגוני על דבר אשתי.

Sorry, Avimelech, there is no fear of G-d here and I was worried you would kill me to get to Sarah. Can this be correct? Am I understanding this correctly? We just had numerous pesukim showing Avimelech’s fine character. Chazal confirms that the city of Grar was a place of culture and morals (unlike Egypt), and Avraham’s response is that there is no fear of G-d? At first glance, this looks like Avraham spitting in Avimelech’s face. How is Avraham answering the question? What is even more puzzling is that Avimelech does not respond, apparently conceding to Avraham’s statement. What does this all mean?

My Rebbi of four years at Yeshiva University, Rabbi Abba Bronspigiel, suggested the following answer based on the commentary of Rav Hirsch and the Malbim. Avraham was saying the following: It is true that Grar is a place of fine culture and morals, but any time societal norms are based on anything but fear of G-d, there is the fear that they can change at any moment.

Perhaps today society does not condone illicit relationships, but if you want something badly enough and you are the King, you can just as easily change the norms. The only thing that is eternal and non-breakable are the laws created by G-d himself. Unfortunately, history has proven this to be true. Pre-World War Two Germany was viewed as a place of fine culture and high morals. There were even animal protection laws that were more more protective than those in most civilized countries today. (CLICK HERE to read about this). And yet, we all know how quickly the norms and acceptable practices changed in Germany. If they are not G-d given laws, they can change in a heartbeat. This was the answer Avraham gave to Avimelech and Avimelech’s lack of response shows he understood why Avraham was concerned for his life.

Perhaps we can use this idea to understand the differences in the Torah’s description of the events in Egypt vs. the events in Grar. When Avraham and Sarah go down to Egypt, they are going to a place known for its licentiousness, immorality and lewd behaviour. In this instance, the Torah describes the detail and motivation of Avraham’s plan with Sarah. This was done as a warning, not just for Sarah, but for all of us to understand that when it comes to immoral places, we must do everything in our power to avoid the bad influences, perhaps even extending the truth. But when a similar episode occurs in Grar, the city of fine character and morals that are not based on fear of G-d, Sarah does not need any explanation. Like Avraham, she understood  he would be concerned about these non-G-d made norms and practices. The Torah didn’t want us to think  this situation was just like Egypt; no, it was an even harder challenge as it seemed like a nice city. To teach us this valuable lesson, the Torah chose to say less and hide this message in the storyline. Perhaps the Torah not explicitly detailing Avraham explaining this to Sarah indicates, unlike Rashi’s concern, that she might not go along with it, but rather, she didn’t need any convincing at all.